Monday, January 18, 2010

Gimpy Gertrude

I started writing my “How to Apply Heat Well” book today.  I think at least two recipes would be perfect for a football party if I had an inkling of excitement for football (I like to record the game and fast forward to the commercials) or any will to be social.  I believe I *could* get as excited as that chick for a good wedge…but they don’t have deli’s out here in Seattle—which makes my stomach cry. 
That is… as soon as I figure out what a Black Russian is.  Though I am certain that I am more likely to drink dark beer today than to drink my coffee black… and I don’t know why I’m continuing this train of thought… probably b/c I already wasted the really gook MLK cards last week.  I also started physical therapy for my foot last week (I only cried a lil after telling him that I couldn’t relax b/c he terrified me.)  I went for round two today… and after consulting Dr. Rach, I am switching therapists.  I can’t believe it’s been 10 weeks and I’m still a Gimpy Gertrude.  And don’t worry I have a card for what you’re thinking:
I’m still following the Conan drama… and therefore this card really touched my heart:
I have been on the phone with a lot of airlines lately… and I’m thoroughly displeased.  After one call I realized it would cost me less to cancel a ticket and rebook than to pay the change fee.  Another just bounced me around for a while—all in attempt to get an email confirmation resent.  The one that really got me upset was calling on behalf of Marisa and her ill husband—trying to change their flight so that he wouldn’t give an entire cross-Atlantic flight a stomach virus only to find that even with a doctor’s note the change would cost them 1200 dollars per person to switch to the next day. And I still need to make a couple more reservations… which I am thoroughly looking forward to.  In the words of Cathy Brigg Small: “Ggeeesh.”
Zach told me that he had a painting assignment recently—the first since, well, finger painting in kindergarten.  He didn’t want to mix the colors at all, so if it required black, but all he had was purple, well then purple hair, birds and tires it is.  When the teacher asked if it was his first project he replied “Oh no, I’ve been doing this for yeeeears.”  Her response?  “You know Zach, you’re quite funny.”   He also called to ask for some “necessary items” like foam swords.  When I asked why he needed them he said “To fight with, Duh.  Who doesn’t need foam swords.”
I tried out all of the Zynga games on Facebook this week.  They don’t float my boat at all.  I don’t need any game telling me what to do—especially when to do it.  And then, knowing how captivating these applications are to people—I started wondering what was wrong with me.  And then I said, wait, there’s nothing wrong with me.  I just need more thinking, a challenge… or at the very least a story or social interaction.  Give me a game of Scrabble with Sheelin, even when I’m losing miserably over YoVille any day.  The good news? I won’t be addicted any time soon.  The most attention grabbing was Janette’s poker game, but after continuously getting hit on during the game—I left the table.  Turns out my golden boobs picture wasn’t the only attention grabbing image in my arsenal. 
I forgot to have coffee yesterday.  Actually I had three cups—but it was decaf.  By 3pm I was so sleepy I had to take a nap—and now we know—without coffee I would rather be unconscious.

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