Monday, January 9, 2012

Singular Secret

Hi Friend,

I stole “Hi Friend” from Debina, so now, when I call her and she answers, “Hi Friend” I just want to giggle and then I forget why I called her.  And before you say, “You can’t steal ‘Hi Friend’ from someone, that’s just a normal greeting,” let me tell you, it definitely isn’t when she says it.  And I believe in giving credit where credit is due.  Sorry (Arda) if sometimes my memory prevents me from doing that.

Last Monday, I had the day off (like the rest of the country).  We kicked it off with a farewell breakfast at IHop for Nater, followed by hanging out with Dawne, Zach and Luke (because unlike the rest of us, Jordan had to work).  We took bags to goodwill to make room for Christmas presents, took down the tree, and basically did chores while watching the rest of “How I Met Your Mother.”  (While I was gone, I missed 5 seasons, but the house is done watching, which is kind of the same thing.) We started watching Coupling, on the suggestion of Shane – turns out he can suggests good TV sometimes.  :P

Me: How does this new Apple TV system work?
Zach: It’s too complicated to explain to you.

Me: Will you teach me how the new Apple TV system works?
Luke: Sure.  You press these two buttons. 

(Thanks for the confidence, Zach.)

Tuesday, pink roses showed up on my desk and I refuse to tell anyone who they are from, which is driving everyone nuts at work.  Is this what keeping secrets feels like?  If it is, it is delicious. 

Rollie: Welcome.
Me: Hi Sunshine! I can’t chat I’m late for a date.
Rollie: (said things I won’t repeat)
Me:  He's read my blog so he already knows my good material.
Rollie: Does he know he’ll be in it shortly?

I do wonder why I don’t have people sign a waiver when they talk to me – you know so they know about the “It’s less of a circle of trust as it is a line of trust, straight into my blog.” 

Mom: What is your plan tonight?
Me: I have date.
Mom: What?
Me: A date.
Mom: A what?
Me: You know when a woman spends time with a gentleman caller for the express purpose of getting to know one another? 
Mom: Oh! A Date!
Me: I need to get out more if my own mother doesn’t recognize the word when it comes out of my mouth.
Mom:  Well, Be nice. 
Me: I will be!
Mom: And don’t be sarcastic. 
Me: Be reasonable.  Frita would never ask that from me. 

PS: I had a similar conversation, almost word for word, with Jen – sans the to-do list. Not a good sign. Know what else isn’t a good sign?   Someone who I chat with on a regular basis at work thought that I was married. Maybe I should put on my to-do list: Act more needy, insecure and desperate for a man then loudly announce “I wish *I* was married!” whenever there is a lull in the conversation. Honestly,  I have no idea where to put this information in my brain, so I’m writing it here hoping it will disappear from my consciousness.  It’s either that, or try to convince myself it’s good that I exude a sense of established security in my life and therefore am not confused with the average single lady but that won’t help with “A What?!; A Date!!” issue.   

I was telling people at work that I think my back pain is actually stemming from my chair at my desk.
M: That could be.
Me: Thirty really is the new seventy.  
M: That’s not true.
R: Maybe it is to a woman. 
Me: Too close to the truth, dude. 

I was on my way out of the office holding a box of books for an author signing that was happening later that evening.

M: I’m going to head out early.  I need to run home and put these books into a bag because this box doesn’t match my outfit.
Boss: hehe  Seriously?
M: Ha. ha. Kind of, yea. 

Later, when I showed up to the signing, I had transferred the books into a wolf bag.  Like a bag, with a wolf on it.  It really did match my outfit much better than the unwieldy box – which just made my boss make fun of me more.  Guess what he’s getting for his birthday?

In our house, when it is your birthday, you get to choose where we go for dinner. Naturally, Lucas chose to celebrate his 16th birthday at IKEA, which also meant that when Cori (German) arrived on Friday, she got to enjoy the joy and wonder that is IKEA with us.  That’s where you bring international guests yes? 

Lucas: Now that we have foreigners with us, it’s not as fun to make fun of the names. 

After talking to our visitor about professional extreme sports and hearing stories about hanging out with other pro’s in the biking world, Lucas said to me, “It’s weird to think that any of your friends are professionals.”  Which is true when thinking of Pro Sports people for sure, but I think it’s also true of my non-athletic friends.  Seriously, I can’t believe we, and especially some of you, are “Professionals.”

Last night Zach turned on True Grit, an Academy Award winning movie, for around 15 minutes.  He then declared that it was not for him, and put on Jackie Chan’s “Project A.”  Let’s keep that in mind next time he suggests watching something.  Also, he was complaining about the lack of choices on Netflix.  I’m starting to think that it might be impossible to make Luke and Zach happy at the same time.  Individually, sure, I think I can figure that out, together? Impossible.  Add in the happiness of two dogs and my week has gotten very complicated.  Even after two trips to the park yesterday, the little dog was still complaining that I wasn’t playing enough with her.  Doesn’t she know that *I’M* supposed to be the high maintenance one?

I had lunch with Rach yesterday, which was amazing.  I had asked her to go Ice Skating with me, but after a Mimosa/Coffee lunch and taking a look at a crowded rink, we opted to go for a walk instead.  Maybe Ice Skating is a “Once a Season” type sport.  (Who am I kidding? For me that’s kinda of the definition of every sport.  Do I really think I’ll be playing Racquetball again this year?) 

And finally, I’ll leave you with this interaction I had last night:

Lucas: I think the traces of Peanuts are starting to affect me. 
Me: Why would you even try to eat a Luna bar?
Lucas: They said it was for women and I wanted to prove them wrong.  I better take some Benadryl. 

No comments:

Post a Comment